Mahlakas hirveburger teraleival

July 1st, 2016

Filed Under: bacon, cheddar, onion, pickle, venison with 0 Comments

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A burger is a sandwich. And an open-faced sandwich is a sandwich. So it stands to reason that an open-faced burger is a sandwich, too.

Especially if the burger includes thick-sliced, fatty bacon; pickled onions; black bread; and a venison patty. Also, when I say “fatty” bacon, I suspect you may not fully understand just how fatty I mean. This is a country where many bars and restaurants include, well, simply slices of pork fat on their menu. This particular bar/restaurant happened to serve its slice of pork fat attached to the rest of the slice of bacon, on top of a patty of venison, and below rings of pickled onion, with the whole kaboodle being on a slice of black bread. Fucking delicious.

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Brain Sandwich

December 17th, 2007

Filed Under: beef, brain, meat, onion, pickle, vegetables with 10 Comments

This summer I visited Ferguson’s Pub in St. Louis, pursuing the holy grail of sandwich related journalism: the Brain Sandwich. This massive chunk of beef brain has been increasingly hard to find, due to fears of Mad Cow disease and general disgustingness, but St. Louis remains blissfully willing to consider the following as edible:

Brain Sandwich 001

Not much in the way of ingredients, the brain sandwich overwhelms a couple of pickle slices and two small pieces of rye (destroyed by the hard deep fried texture of the brain like wooden ships against a rocky coast). Onions are supplied for those inclined…

Brain Sandwich 002

The sandwich itself is remarkably tasty at first – the edges have a high surface area to mass ratio, meaning you get a lot of deep fried goodness per mouthful of brain. However, as you get deeper into the organ, it starts to squirt fluid into your mouth with each bite, and the texture becomes much wetter and less crunchy. As you reach the middle of the sandwich, the realization that you’re eating undercooked brain replaces any remaining enjoyment with a wholly blanketing nausea.

Brain Sandwich 003

I’m looking forward to my inevitable case of bovine spongiform encephalopathy.

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Scrambled eggs and ham

October 27th, 2007

Filed Under: cheddar, ham, swiss, toasted with 0 Comments

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Got this at the municipal IHOP, because it was the most sandwichy thing on the menu. It’s quite breakfasty, mostly on account of the scrambled eggs, but it was perfectly fine for dinner as well. That said, my review of the sandwich is decidedly mixed. The combination of scrambled eggs and two kinds of melted cheese gave it a generally very goopy mouthfeel that the ham and bread did little to offset. Even worse, the bottom slice of toast was thoroughly soggy when it arrived, so it had clearly been sitting for a while before being brought out. Some of my complaints are directed towards the abstracted ideal of the sandwich, and some are directed towards the particular IHOP franchisee that served it to me, but it’s hard to tell exactly where to draw the line between them. The onion rings were fantastic, though.

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A Contradiction in Terms

September 10th, 2007

Filed Under: cheddar, vegetables with 1 Comment

Bacon Veggie Burger

An odd paradox of food, I ordered this veggie burger with bacon. It was at a Jimmy Buffett-owned burger restaurant my sister took me to. It’s a fairly standard bacon cheeseburger, featuring lettuce, tomato, onions, cheddar cheese, and so on, except I requested to have a veggie burger patty. You can get any burger there as a veggie burger.

Really, most of the time, I could hardly tell that it wasn’t a real bacon cheeseburger. Sometimes, of course, a bite should’ve been meatier than it was, and I could tell it was a veggie patty. But really, I don’t see THAT big of a difference… I guess I’m not that picky when it comes to food. Oh, also, the sweet potato chips were really good. Mmm.

Funny story, actually, my sister ordered a BBQ veggie burger or something, but wound up getting a mushroom swiss veggie burger by mistake. They prepared her the correct burger, and I got a free bonus burger out of the deal. Plus the restaurant also covered one of her drinks. So a free mixed drink and a free burger! Now THAT’s service! We left a nice tip.

Veggie Mushroom Swiss

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Veggie Fajita Melt

August 21st, 2007

Filed Under: lettuce, onion, tomato, vegetables with 0 Comments

Veggie Fajita Melt

The Veggie Fajita Melt. Picked it up after quite a complicated quest to find an ATM, in order to get out of a parking lot… Figured I deserved a break.

It’s got lettuce, tomato, guacamole, peppers, and some other stuff. I’m not sure on the cheese. I think it was provolone… It was some manner of white cheese anyway. There might’ve been a little sauce added, too. It was a little drippy.

Anyway, the advertisement looked different from the sandwich itself, of course, but it looked like it had a different balance of ingredients. I was expecting a sandwich consisting of more peppers and onions, but I got one with more guacamole. I didn’t even notice guacamole in the ad until I looked again after eating it. It was actually still pretty good, to be honest, and was a nice change of pace from normal sandwiches I might eat. Don’t often have ones with guacamole. It made it pretty interesting.

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Chicken salad.

May 30th, 2007

Filed Under: chicken salad, lettuce, tomato with 0 Comments

Chicken salad.

Chicken salad.

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