Ham and Law

April 21st, 2009

Filed Under: ham, mayonnaise, mustard with 0 Comments

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In half an hour, I’ll have a three-hour essay exam that will be the sole determining factor for my grade in a three-credit class. Thankfully, I had the foresight to pack a sandwich of baked Virginia ham on a delectable seven-grain sourdough. So even if I can’t remember whether Congress is permitted to effectively conscript state executive officers into enforcing its laws (it isn’t), at least I won’t be lacking for nutrition.

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Pepper-turkey

April 16th, 2009

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Pepper-turkey

As I may have mentioned, I have a thing for pepper. But can you blame me? After all, pepper is known as “the gift of the east.” (Let’s ignore the fact that gift means ‘poison’ in Swedish.)

Anyway, this is another case of pepper spicing up an otherwise-bland cold cut. I’m trying not to reflect upon the way the pepper is evenly distributed through the uniform, textureless slices of ‘turkey’ here. I really don’t know what kind of processing it’s been through. Thankfully, it ends up being rather tasty.

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A New Sandwich for America

January 20th, 2009

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A veritable shitload of people gathered on and around the National Mall today, to celebrate the inauguration of a new President. Some waited for hours in the bitter cold or drove from hundreds of miles away; others were lucky enough to arrive and find a place to stand fifteen minutes before the ceremonies started. People of every race, creed, and color were standing together, united in one common trait — hunger.

Seriously, though, I knew I’d be standing out there a long time. So I brought sandwiches.

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Hesburger’s Rukkifileeburger

July 23rd, 2008

Filed Under: mayonnaise, onion, pork cutlet, tomato with 6 Comments

Delicious!

Back in May, my family went on a trip to Estonia. While there, I had the opportunity to eat at places one does not generally eat at in the United States.

For example, Hesburger. A fast-food joint, not unlike the places we know of with kingly burgers or burgers owned by a clown. However, as Hesburger is more of a European thing, they can have some interesting things there.

This sandwich is the “Rukkifileeburger”, which is Estonian for “Rye fillet burger”. Adding the “burger” on the end is a little misleading, since it contains a pork fillet of some sort, and not a meat patty we generally associate with burgers.

Anyway, the main ingredients are the pork, lettuce, tomatoes, and onion rings, with some manner of special sauce (“paprika mayo” apparently), all between two slices of dark rye bread. Rye bread is more popular in some European countries, so Hesburger decided to offer rye sandwiches in their burger joints, I guess.

The sandwich was a little better than I expected, but I wasn’t really expecting much. The rye bread was interesting… I expected slices of a loaf of rye, but it’s more like one of those rectangular shaped chicken sandwiches you might find in fast food places here in the US. Except instead of whatever bun they’d use here, it was rye bread.

Still, it could’ve been better. I mean, this is fast food we’re talkin’ here. Fast food isn’t well known for the greatest of sandwiches. But I greatly support unusual sandwich choices in places, and this gave me a chance to write about rye-fillet-burgers. I’d eat another if I get the chance, though largely for the novelty of eating an odd sandwich like this in a fast food place.

Overhead picture Alternate angle

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Full Sandwich, Half Dome

December 30th, 2007

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“Hunger,” Benjamin Franklin is alleged to have stated, “is the best pickle.” There are a few different things that might mean — a few of the dictionary definitions for the noun pickle are: a cucumber, or other vegetable or foodstuff, preserved in brine or marinade; a liquid usually prepared with salt or vinegar for preserving or flavoring fish, meat, vegetables, etc.; Informal. a troublesome or awkward situation. So which of those makes sense? [1]

Anyway, whatever Benjamin Franklin had in mind, this much is clear: hiking four miles and 3000 vertical feet in Yosemite Valley makes you hungry. And that hunger makes an already-delicious sandwich taste even better.

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[1] Interestingly enough, all of these meanings were in use by Franklin’s time: “brine or marinade” dates from c.1440; “cucumber preserved in brine” was first recorded in 1707; and the figurative sense of “sorry plight” was first recorded in 1562.

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Black Forest

December 8th, 2007

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Black Forest Ham

In Europe, “Black Forest ham” is a protected term indicative of a particular geographical origin and method of preparation: the name is applied only to those hams from Germany’s Black Forest region that have been cured and cold smoked with a distinctive flavoring.

In the United States, on the other hand, there are no such restrictions on the use of the term—but it’s still delicious.

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Pepper-ham

October 18th, 2007

Filed Under: ham, mustard, provolone with 1 Comment

Pepper-ham

This is another sandwich precipitated by the purchase of the rye loaf mentioned previously. In this case, the meat was a similar impulse buy. I like ham [1] and I really like pepper [2], so pepper-encrusted ham seemed like a natural choice. Can’t say I regret it in the least.

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[1] And who doesn’t like ham? Besides Jains, Jews, Muslims, Seventh-day Adventists and Rastafarians, I mean.

[2] I’ve pissed a lot of people off by indulging in one of my favorite beverages, piprapiim (‘peppermilk’). I came up with it myself, and nobody else likes it. Which is fine, because there’s more for me that way.

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Roast beef sandwich

October 13th, 2007

Filed Under: beef, mustard, provolone, toasted with 0 Comments

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I was at the grocery store when a beautiful loaf of rye bread caught my eye and began begging and pleading for me to make a sandwich with it. I tried to avert my gaze and continue down the aisle, but it was no use—I couldn’t get those shapely slices, those gorgeous caraway seeds, out of my mind. I went back and apologized for even considering being so heartless and cruel, proudly gave the bread the seat of honor in my shopping cart, and made my way over to the deli department to pick up some other ingredients of a similar caliber. No cheap stuff today; both the roast beef and the provolone (sharp, never mild) were Boar’s Head™.

And it was delicious.

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Mass-produced love

May 31st, 2007

Filed Under: ham, lettuce, mayonnaise, onion, provolone, tomato with 0 Comments

Subway BMT

A perfectly competent sandwich, if nothing particularly special. Made on an assembly line.

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“On the Grill”ed Cheese Sandwich

May 28th, 2007

Filed Under: cheddar, mustard, tomato with 0 Comments

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Because this is a massive grilling weekend, grilled cheese made on a bbq grill with mustard and tomato.

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